I Have A Dream

I think Martin Luther King Jr.'s "I Have A Dream" speech is one of the most inspirational, celebrational, muppetational speeches of all time.  It speaks to a Universal truth about all men (and women, calm down) being created equal and a world where people are "not judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character."  It's a noble aspiration.  And one I wholeheartedly agree with.  Still, there is a fundamental problem to this speech -- it's title.  It is commonly known as the "I Have A Dream" speech.  When, really, I think it should be known as the "I Have A Really Great Idea" speech.  Because, let's face it, no one dreams like this.

Based on the title of the speech, I would think it would be more likely, to go like this ...  "I have a dream ... that I am being chased by a giant spider and I can't get away because the tires on my Big Wheel won't move.  I have a dream ... that I'm falling from the sky and Lena Horne won't give me the frying pans.  I have a dream ... that I'm the same age I am now but for some reason I'm back in school and there's a test I didn't know about and I'm sitting at my desk in my underwear and everyone is staring at me because the phone that I have instead of a right hand won't stop ringing.  I have a dream ... that I really have to pee and there's no place to go so I try going in my clothes hamper but I still really have to pee.  I have a dream ... that I'm driving in a car from the back seat with my feet and it's out of control and I'm headed right towards a rock wall and just before I crash ... I wake up!  And that's when I have this really great idea -- that we  all should live in a world where people are not judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character."

When I got out of bed to write this idea down, my bedroom floor turned to water and I fell in and found myself being chased by sharks with Mila Kunis heads.  So maybe it really is a dream after all.  Shame.

Why is my laundry wet?